Strange, but one night a few months back, I just died and no one realized..

I woke up one night, a few months back, from a dream I had. I'd probably fallen off to sleep on the carpet. I would have usually gone off to sleep on any other day, but that day was different. I cant recall exactly why, but I think I just wanted to be there on the carpet, where I had been painting something.

No, I am not a great painter. Sometimes I even wonder if we can draw a painting and paint a drawing.
So you see, I am not so much of a Picasso! But there are times when I can afford to be impressed by what my brushes can create on the paper.

So I was there in my room painting away to glory and I guess I should have fell asleep sometime into it. And I had a dream which I can not recollect right now. But never the less mid-flight, the dream woke me up. With out an idea of where I was, I opened my eyes to a source of bright white light. I had been in some dark cavern in my dream I guess, for if a tube light had to be this bright, I wonder where else I could have just come from.

I just lay there for some time, still unaware of where I was. And slowly my eyes faded the bright light and it seemed like I was back in the cavern again. But this time my ears picked up all the sounds around me. I could hear my heart pounding against my ribs, and then the fan , the sweat drop trickling down my neck- yes I heard that too. Slowly the darkness faded again and the bright light returned, spare a few more minutes and the tube, the static fan, the unfinished painting, and the 'rolled-up me', all came into my vision one by one.

I just got up, sleeping on the floor had made me kind of numb. I climbed down the stairs ( yes I climbed down) and went to sleep next to my lil sister, to the warmth and the safety of my loved ones. Sleep never came soon though and when it came, I went back to the world of imagination. I couldn't possibly explain. I dreamt of all my fears coming true, all the things I never would have wanted were now visually being served to me.

I relearned my alphabets. I startlingly realised how as a kid I couldn't remember just one single letter from the alphabets and would trembling, recite the alphabets before a stick wielding tutor, who made sure that the skin on my palms and knees were deep red each time I repeated my own 25 lettered alphabet group- having forgotten just one of them. And since then I hate the letter.

As the darkness outside gave way to the yellow sunshine, I woke up again.
I climbed the stairs back to my room, I had a tooth brush somewhere there too. I keep a number of toothbrush in and around the house for easy accessibility in the mornings, cos that's the part of the day when I am the laziest and the least in senses.

I opened the door to my room, the always cluttered room was now so neat and pristine. The chaos from the past few days had gone and in the middle of the room sat my painting, all complete. It stood out in the eerily spotless room. I walked closer to the painting, I hadn't completed it last night, so much I knew. And as I was intensely studying the painting, someone came out from my bathroom and walked to the wardrobe. I pulled out one of my favorite grey t shirt from it. Grey is my favorite color for dresses, it helps me feel confident and good when I am not very much in my elements.

Wait a minute, I just told you that I was watching over my painting and at the same time took out a tee from the wardrobe, and that someone just came out from my bathroom??? OK, so I was in my room, when I came out of the bathroom. Means there was.. well brace for it... another version of me. And as I stood there watching, my mobile beeped to notify a message that I just received.
As I walked closer to the mobile, the other me took it. She read the message ( or do I say' I read the message'?) and gave a swift reply- 'Yup in 20.  As you say :)'. Soon packed her bag ( My bag) had her breakfast and left.

I went back upstairs, and brushed my teeth wondering that since I had more than one toothbrush why I never collectively called them my 'teeth brush'. Yes not the perfect timing for such thoughts especially when I had an another me who just walked out of my home, in my dress, with my mobile, having had my breakfast. Great! So I went down to my mother who was busy preparing lunch and told her '' Ma, there are two me's''
She dint look my way, was too busy in the cooking, or so I thought.

 The lil one just came back from the gate, after having gone to open it for the other me to leave. So I thought I'l tell her first. As she sat watching the TV, I joined her and told her ' Vavachi, there's something I got to tell you, its scary. There's this another me, you just opened the gate for her' . My sister dint look my way either. I wondered what happened to her. I went back to my room and opened the ward robe, thought maybe a bath might help wash the dream off. I was convinced that this was a bad dream.
After the wash, I came back to my room, and as I looked into the mirror I saw no me but the beige wall behind. I looked again. No me! I tried all the mirrors at home. Nothing seemed to pick me up.


I learned that day what it meant to be petrified. I roamed the house, sat with my sister, slept on moms lap, cried. I watched over them through the day. And as evening came, the other me came. I loved how my folks' face lit up on seeing the other me. Jealousy hit me. That wasn't me, they just think its me.It was unfair- but probably it was always the same, I just didn't notice it before.

The other me was talking to them all about today. I wanted to do that. I was the one who always did that. Its strange but now that I can't, there's nothing, that I more want. I wanted to swap the situation with her. Anything to go back. But that was impossible. I saw how she kept replying to the texts that were for me. Everything that was mine now belonged to her. I just went back to my room, and curled up on the carpet once again.

Strange, but one night a few months back, I just died, and no one realized...

HOLLOWED FROM TEARS REFRAINED.

Strange but how my heart needs nothing more,
When lo and behold its no longer my own.
If there was a window that opened or maybe a door,
That could trade me places to things that have long gone.
I'd with pleasure open em all,
Just to be there, where I always was.
But now that I have survived this fall,
I'v not much choice but to go on, cos here there's no sub-clause.
Drowned in this fragments of my brain
I'm stuck, hollowed, and from tears I try to refrain.


p.s:- A fragment of my brain, you call it illusionary imagination -But I write in puns.